This paper argues that online networks Tinder and Instagram have caused social change through their influence on millennials and Generation Z. This has ultimately resulted in a negative shift in the views on love, commitment and the formation of deep connections held by these generations. Instagram’s highlight reel has become responsible for relationship dissatisfaction amongst younger generations, influencing how they feel they should be behaving both in relationships and sexually. There is a contrast that Millennials and Generation Z find themselves stuck between which is that of feeling the need to stray from traditional romantic love while still truly wanting and desiring romantic love. Studies within this paper, specifically those from Irum Saeed Abbasi, conclude that online networks threaten relationships and relationship commitment. Abbasi’s research finds that online network usage strongly correlates to high infidelity rates and overall relationship dissatisfaction. Tinder’s influence on society and hook-up culture is also discussed throughout the paper with case studies involving college students concluding that more often than not, both men and women experience regret following casual sexual acts. Overall, the most significant general finding of this paper is the social change that has been bought about by these online networks. Society’s views surrounding love and relationships have dramatically changed over the past decades. Love has ultimately become more superficial and temporary due to instant and self-gratification, two things heavily influenced by social media.

Online networks have increasingly become one of the most significant aspects of the modern world. They have impacted human interactions and relationships, transformed different elements of society and ultimately led to an abundance of social change. While much of the social change that has come about has been positive, there are aspects in which online networks have bought about negative social change. Within modern society and the time in which we live many relationships have become based on surface-level connections and sex, thanks to online networks such as Tinder and Instagram. Millennials and Generation Z have grown to be so influenced by the online world and the plethora of continuous options it offers that they have gravitated to hook-up culture, influenced by the idea that “the grass is always greener on the other side” and the idea that someone better is always out there. The rise of online networks, like Instagram and Tinder, in the 21st century, has had a significant impact on today’s generations, negatively influencing and impacting their views and thoughts surrounding love, furthermore, creating an inability to form deep connections and commit.  

To understand the ways that online networks can implement social change and have such a negative impact on human relationships and society we must first understand the terms “networked publics” and “refracted publics”. “Networked publics” is a term that refers to publics that have been reconstructed by networked technologies. A place where new and digital media networks have become a public sphere for participation and communication. They are constructed via networked technologies and essentially, they allow people to gather for social, cultural, and civic reasons, assisting people to connect from different sides of the world. “Networked publics” have allowed for the rise of social networking sites to be further understood including the ways people engage and the reasons they engage (boyd, 2010). “Refracted publics” is a term that has developed from boyd’s idea of “networked publics” and focuses on more recent technological changes. Unlike “networked publics” which is a concept based on online networking sites during the 2000s, “refracted publics” were developed from anthropological and sociological studies surrounding internet culture during the 2010s. “Refracted publics” are more so concerned with what platforms have to offer users and groups rather than the structure of these networked groups (Abidin, 2021). Through “networked publics” and “refracted publics” we can gain a deeper understanding of why people use online social networking sites, the cultures and groups that gather or form on these sites, and more importantly, how these online networks have influenced our relationships with one another.

It’s no secret that hook-up culture has become a rather “normal” aspect of today’s society, especially among millennials and now generation Z. Statistics that state that since 2015 there has been a 30% increase in STDs, with more than 2.5 million cases of chlamydia, syphilis and gonorrhoea reported in 2019 in America alone should no longer come as surprise (CDC, 2021). When it comes to hookup culture one rather prevalent online network that comes to mind is Tinder. In a society where through comparison and heightened expectations of oneself social media has told you are not good enough, Tinder has gone and done the absolute opposite. The dating or more so hook up app acts as more than just a place where you can get sex as quick as you can Uber eats. It’s a place where you can also go for instant validation that you are attractive, a much-needed self-esteem boost after hours of scrolling through Instagram. Argued by McGuire in a study that investigates Millennials’ perceptions of how their individual capacity for romantic love develops and manifests, suggests that current and upcoming generations of young adults may be too narcissistic to build and develop authentic romantic relationships with one another (McGuire, 2015). British author and inspirational speaker Simon Sinek made a similar point when he discussed how building and holding meaningful relationships is something that requires a level of patience, something that we as a generation may not have acquired (Sinek, 2016). Social media has created a selfish generation that believes they can have whoever and whatever they want. This has been fuelled by networks like Tinder that make us believe that we are worthy of anyone without needing to put in any real effort, further implicating one’s ability to form a deep and meaningful relationship. 

While social networking sites like Tinder have and still do evidentially play a large part in affecting and altering views on love and commitment, it’s not the only site to blame. Instagram is another online network having a significant negative impact on the already problematic situation that Tinder has created. Research and case studies have identified a strong link between the high use of online networks such as Instagram and low relationship commitment as well as infidelity. One of the main reasons for this is the consistent presence of online alternative attractions (Abbasi, 2018; Drounin et al, 2014) which are essentially other social media users to whom we find ourselves attracted. Online alternative attractions have been found within these studies to extensively impact one’s ability to commit and their thoughts surrounding commitment. The continuous swiping and scrolling through Tinder profiles and Instagram feeds are producing a society of people who feel they have infinite choices of who their sexual partners could be (Riley, 2015). It’s no secret that Instagram is a highlight reel that mainly only showcases the best of everyone and everything. The highlight reel provides a false perception of what an ideal romantic partner and relationship supposedly should look like. This further leads partners in romantic and committed relationships to negatively evaluate their own partner and relationship, without even realising this decreases one’s own relationship commitment (Abbasi, 2018). This surplus of online profiles and content provided by online networks is generating social change and creating a modern society full of wondering eyes, where the ability to be satisfied and commit to relationships is gradually diminishing. 

Something I would like to quickly touch on is how online networks have gradually implemented the idea that we can never be satisfied with what we have. A very basic and relatable example of this is Instagram Ads. While ads may have nothing to do with love and commitment, they have a lot to do with satisfaction. I think most of us know what happens when we complete an online order or perhaps even have a conversation when we’re around our phone, we log into our Instagram and there it is. An abundance of ads that relate to exactly what you have just purchased or spoken about, whether it is the same brand or something extremely similar, it’s sitting there in your feed. Online networks are continually trying to offer up a better option and convince you that you should want more. Just like in the studies spoken about above and the discussion of online alternative attractions (Abbasi, 2018; Drounin et al, 2014), online networks make you feel as though you shouldn’t be satisfied with what you have, no matter how new or shiny it is. If online networks can so easily make us dissatisfied with our physical belongings imagine how easily they’re making us feel dissatisfied with our partners and relationships.

An important thing to note about this newfound lack of love and commitment within today’s generation, is whether this is how people want to be behaving or if it is a pressure put in place by society and social media? An article posted by The Conversation interviewed several college students surrounding their thoughts on hook-up culture and the influence of apps such as Tinder. Students discussed their feelings surrounding intimacy and how people have become so afraid to voice that intimacy is something that they want and crave. There is this expectation that everyone is supposed to be hypersexual and only want to “just have sex”. Students also commented on the pressure put on them by their friends and peers with people being forced to make a move on someone and told that “you need to f**k someone tonight” even if it is of no interest to them (Orchard, 2020). “The four common features of this culture: lack of commitment, ambiguous language, alcohol use, and social pressure to conform” (Kelly, 2012). 

A large web-based study of 1,468 undergraduate students looked at hook-up culture. The study found that after casual sex “27.1 per cent felt embarrassed, 24.7 per cent reported emotional difficulties, 20.8 per cent experienced a loss of respect, and 10 per cent reported difficulties with a steady partner” (Lewis et al., 2011). Another study with a sample size of 200 undergraduate students found that 78 per cent of women and 72 per cent of men who have engaged in uncommitted sex and sexual acts reported a history of experiencing regret following the encounter (Fisher et al., 2012).  On a different note, a broader study looked at life satisfaction and where Americans find meaning in their lives. This study concluded that 1 in 5 Americans links the meaning of life to being in love and those in the study who mentioned a partner rated their lives 9% higher than those who did not mention a partner (Kessel & Hughes, 2018). 

The collection of findings from the studies discussed above concludes that both men and women have interests in and are motivated to engage in casual hook-ups, however, this engagement is often followed by regret. These studies further confirm that humans are searching for something deeper than just casual sex and that there is a desire for a more romantic relationship (Garcia, 2013). However, factors like social media and online networks are creating pressure to conform to this new culture, even though so many people link the meaning of life to being in love and in a committed relationship, with evidence showing people in relationships are more satisfied with their lives. Evidently hook up culture isn’t all it is presented to be. 

Social theorist Zygmunt Bauman discusses the belief held by some that sexual skills are destined to grow as one accumulates experience and that accumulating these different experiences creates excitement. Essentially, the idea is that the next love will be an experience supposedly more thrilling than the one currently being enjoyed. However, it will not be anywhere near as exciting and rewarding as the one that will come after (Bauman, 2013), a toxic cycle of chasing a more thrilling love and sexual feeling. A cycle that has become so easy to fall into due to online networks like Tinder and Instagram. Tinder is the fuel this cycle needs to exist and online networks are possibly the roots that once grew this toxic cycle. A large sum of Bauman’s theories looks at the idea that humans within a modern world find themselves caught between having security and having freedom. Since when did having love means not having freedom? Why have we as a society created this idea that if you are in love and committed then you are not free? Millennials and Generation Z find themselves juxtaposed between straying from traditional romantic love yet still craving and deeply desiring romantic love (McGuire, 2015). Online networks being the cause of this, making people feel as though straying from love-based relationships is perhaps trendy. 

Online networks like Tinder and Instagram have caused social change through the negative impact they’ve had on millennials and Generation Z, regarding how these generations commit and form deep connections. Ultimately this has impacted how we love and our views surrounding it. The concepts “networked publics” and “refracted publics” have allowed for a deeper understanding of online networks, specifically social media. These concepts allow for an interpretation of how social media and online networks can influence social change, by influencing the ways we relate to and connect with one another. The case studies discussed within this paper have all similarly concluded that online networks pose an immense threat to relationships and relationship commitment. Online network usage is undoubtedly related to relationship dissatisfaction and higher rates of infidelity. Scholars have also made comments on these generations and how they have grown to potentially be too “narcissistic” and self-concerned to form deep connections and commit. In the era of online networks, social media has raised a generation of people who feel they should be more focused on Instagram likes, tinder matches and sex with strangers than love and commitment. Are we living in an age where we expect more from technology than we do from each other? As a generation, we have become addicted to the feeling of falling in love, we continually want the butterflies that come with first dates but don’t want the effort that comes after. Everyone’s life looks perfect on social media so we expect that ours should too. We’ve become a society mainly concerned with the likes of self and instant gratification. If there’s ever a problem in our relationships, we don’t fix it we throw it away because we think there is something better out there. Here’s a secret, the grass isn’t greener on the other side, it’s greener where you water it.