Abstract
This paper explores people’s identities online and how social media can determine the way your identity is viewed by other followers with just a single image. Mainly concentrating on the shift in how parenthood is now viewed by showing all angles of being a parent, not just the ‘pretty’ picture side. The paper argues that we should focus on staying true to ourselves by being as authentic as possible for the followers, how social media platforms such as Instagram can become a flexible job working from home and lastly, the ugly side of sharing your personal life to the public.
Keywords
Identities, Social network site, Instagram, Parenthood, Influencer.
Introduction
A picture is worth a thousand words. Social media is a huge part of our day to day lives now. It is hard to remember a time where we did not communicate online. It has become a great place where users can come together and discuss topics, share tips, gain online exposure or simply just for pure entertainment. Bauman (2000) outlines how through the tough times, an online community can create a safe place where people can feel secure, supported and can relate to other like-minded people. The way parenthood is represented on social media is slowly shifting… and for the better. Hodkinson (2015) bedroom analogy refers to the social network holding on to its intimacy as it is an individual-centred platform that maps out the details of each individual user’s identity. Mothers in particular on social platforms are changing the way parenthood is viewed, by breaking down the stigma surrounding the untold, honest side to parenthood, sharing their bad days, their body image issues, the mental struggles and also their personal tips to support others in the online communities.
Instagram real or fake?
Previously, when signing onto your Instagram account the first thing you would see in the morning is someone sipping a pina colada by the pool at some beautiful tropical island or you will see a baby, somehow posing perfectly for a photo in some cute position. For a lot of mothers out there we usually see images of other parents who seem to have their life in check, doing ‘boss mum’ things, looking glam with their super well behaved children by their side. While we sit there scrolling on our phone, looking down at our milk vomit covered T-shirt, sipping our cold coffee and tying up our dirty hair, feeling sorry for ourselves and wonder where we went wrong? This is proof of the different identities we see online. These flawless images viewers are scrolling past promote unreachable ideals and false expectations that are not real and only leave viewers feeling incompetent or jealous and highlight the lack of things they do not have in their life, rather than acknowledging the positive, great things they do have in their life (Brazaityte). Boyd (2007) talks about how when first creating an online profile, we suss out what is around us, usually it will be whoever invited us to join that platform to begin with. Then we gage what is considered appropriate, what is considered not appropriate and what is considered too much, or oversharing. These days Mothers are breaking down that stigma and showing all sides to parenthood, the good the bad and the ugly.
Body Image and mental struggles
Thanks to the digitisation and convergence to social media, body image is a big deal when it is constantly in your face every day on Instagram. Although we can choose to follow or unfollow who we like, we cannot escape the beautiful bikini booty shots or the flat tanned abs in our newsfeed. The heavily edited photos have created an untrue version of who we actually follow. For example, the Duchess of Cambridge, Kate Middleton appeared all over social media, glammed up and well-groomed, despite only just giving birth a few hours’ prior (Iveta). Today on social media, mothers like are acknowledging parenthood for what it is and outlining those things that were once seen as taboo topics like stretchmarks, cellulite, eye bags or saggy skin (Landry, 2019). If anything they are pointing these things out in particular so the follower is forced to look at these ‘imperfections’ and can feel less alone. Instagram influencers are going down the path of self-love, ripping apart that idealistic view of being a perfect parent and choosing to portray a healthy, natural life without the airbrushing and showing followers that it is all normal and it is ok. Another taboo topic that is now spoken about online is infant loss and Post Natal Depression (PND) allowing users to show their true identities online and not feel like they have to wear a mask and/or not discuss such topics. In other words, not be themselves. With the use of hashtags on Instagram we are able to come together with people who are interested in the similar field for advice and support.
Convergence and Digitisation allowing careers on social media
Another way parents can show their identities online is by using social media as a career path. Convergence according to Henry Jenkins (2004) is the flow of content across media platforms, economies and social and cultural contexts. Digitisation has changed the process of how long it takes for an image to be viewed, by converting any information such as words, sounds or images into a digital format, making it easier to share and quicker to access has allowed us the opportunity to be ourselves online and make a living out of it, becoming an Instagram influencer. According to More Than Size (2017) Your handle on your page is the most important thing. It outlines what you are all about. Will you be focusing on travel? Or food? Or motherhood? Or do you just want people to know you by name? Next is your description box, does is detail exactly what you can expect to see? Is it catchy? Is it boring? Also your profile picture, is it authentic? and is it engaging? Would you want to follow you if you were them? Essentially, your online profile serves as a personal resume and if a business likes the look of your online profile they will most likely reach out and offer to collaborate with you to promote their product. In return for the free promoting they may offer the parent a discount code or free products to trial as well as the exposure that will naturally come with the collaboration. This can help gain mass followers as well as welcome in other business opportunities.
Creating content
When creating content online it is encouraged to stick to what you know and to be genuine. Users enjoy to follow people who are authentic and/or have a niche that is similar to theirs, so your page is seen as relatable and not seen as clickbait. According to More Than Size (2017) Instagram is not a competition for who has the most likes. Hashtags that outline whether a post is sponsored or not can play a huge role in being authentic. If there is sponsored ad, after sponsored ad, after sponsored ad on your newsfeed, followers tend to believe that the recommendation that has been given may not be sincere. But on the other hand, if an image is clearly paid and the user has not acknowledged that it is a sponsored ad then that can be frowned upon also.
Selfies, according to the Oxford Dictionary, ‘selfie’ was labelled word of the year back in 2013. It is known as a photograph that the user has taken of themselves by reversing the camera on a smartphone or webcam and then is uploaded to a social media platform. When people generally think of selfies they portray it as a self-involved action, a way to boost self-esteem (to get the ‘likes’) or even seen as a narcissistic trait (Tiidenberg, 2018). The types of selfies that are uploaded and posted to your profile can say a lot about your image as a person. On the contrary, I believe it is a way to show you are confident in your own skin and is even a way to interact with friends and family on a personal level. For example, Sarah’s Day (2019) as a mother herself, she is constantly posting images and stories of her day-to-day selfie updates with her newborn, showing what they get up to daily, which makes her followers feel included in her life by closing that gap and creating a more personal and relatable space. It is also a fantastic way to document a child’s upbringing by taking a scroll down memory lane and being able to flick back to a previous post that may have had advice or information. Having an ongoing digital photo album in the palm of your hand is a perfect way to capture and hold onto special moments.
The bad side to posting online
Like everything, there is a bad and ugly side to everything. The ugly side to putting your full identity out there online for the public to see is the scrutiny that may follow. Not everyone is going to agree with what they see or like the photos that are posted, so unfortunately for this reason, people are becoming victims of online shaming or online trolling. As a parent the last thing you want is for someone to have an opinion on your child so I believe this is why some parents fall into the trap of posting ‘pretty’ posts just for the sake of pleasing other people, which is not being true to their own identity. Also a negative side convergence has had on social media is how quick an online image could spread. This could potentially be a good thing if you are hoping to go viral. But it can also be a dangerous thing as once a photo is posted online it is almost impossible to delete it from the internet. The ability to share a single image to thousands of people online in a click of a button can be scary as you are unaware of who is viewing them on the other side of that image. Especially if underage children are involved, it can be a daunting experience if it falls into the wrong hands. It is important to be 100% certain before posting anything publicly.
Editing images to the point where a person can be unrecognisable is a way of hiding your true identity. According to Van Dijck (2008) thanks to filters and Photoshop, we are able to slim our waist, blur any imperfections, whiten our teeth, even draw on some abs if we wanted to. And these are only a few editing options listed to create the ultimate ‘desirable picture’ (or what some users consider a desirable picture). I consider all these editing options as a distraction to detract from what is really posted, it covers a deeper story and makes me think the user isn’t telling me or is hiding something. It loses its authenticity and is potentially getting the viewer to admire something that doesn’t even exist.
Conclusion
Social media has a huge impact on the way we view ourselves and the way others view us. We have become so reliant on our smartphones that we can not go anywhere without them. Instagram has become a platform where people can open up and share their lives, the good, the bad and the ugly side. The digitisation and convergence has allowed users to work from their computer at home and has helped create a more desirable lifestyle that we can share with our online support networks. Our online profile, how we edit our photos and what we post is a reflection of who we are as a person. The engagement that is received is a result of what people think of you. It is our digital online CV. With the acknowledgment of digitisation, social media has allowed everyone the opportunity to shape their own identity, get creative online and to gain exposure by reaching a large number of users quickly.
References
Bauman, Z. (2000). Community: Seeking Safety in an Insecure World.
Boyd, danah. (2007) “Why youth (Heart) Social Network Sites: The Role of Networked Publics in Teenage Social Life.” MacArthur Foundation Series on Digital Learning – Youth, Identity, and Digital Media Volume (ed. David Buckingham). Cambridge, MA: MIT Press
Brazaityte, M. “Woman Sick of How Fake Everything On Instagram Is Reveals The Truth In The Most Epic Way”. Retrieved from https://www.boredpanda.com/author/brazaityte_monika/?utm_source=google&utm_medium=organic&utm_campaign=organic
Hodkinson, P. (2015). Bedrooms and beyond: Youth, identity and privacy on social network sites. New Media and Society.
Iveta, “Women Are Posting Their Post-Birth Pics After Kate Middleton’s Flawless Photos To Show How Different It Was For Them”. Retrieved from https://www.boredpanda.com/kate-middleton-birth-people-comparing-funny-reactions/?utm_source=google&utm_medium=organic&utm_campaign=organic
Jenkins, H. (2004). The Cultural Logic of Media Convergence. International Journal of Cultural Studies, 7(1), 33 -43.
Landry, S. (2019). Retrieved from https://www.instagram.com/thebirdspapaya/?hl=en
More Than Size, (2017). Retrieved from http://morethansize.com/en/your-instagram-identity/
Sarah’s Day (2019) Retrieved from https://www.instagram.com/sarahs_day/?hl=en
Tiidenberg, K. (2018). What are Selfies? In Selfies: Why We Love (and hate) Them (pp. 17–46). United Kingdom: Emerald Publishing Limited.
Van Dijck, J. (2008). Digital photography: communication, identity, memory. Visual Communication, 7(1), 57 -76
Hello,
I read you paper and found it very interesting, I can definitely see the good, the bad and the ugly aspects of social media that you’ve identified!
With regards to digitisation and convergence allowing careers on social media, do you think this is a good thing? Or was everything better before social media was utilised for careers and ‘influencers’ existed?
You can check out my paper:https://networkconference.netstudies.org/2019Curtin/2019/05/03/under-the-influence-social-media-influencers-and-their-role-in-impacting-millennials-travel-decisions/
Hi,
Thankyou for taking the time to read my paper.
In regards to your question about digitisation and convergence allowing careers online, i definitely think this is a good thing. Although it is not your typical ‘9-5’ standard job. It allows the option for people to be more creative, to work from home, to be their own boss which will allow more time to spend with family/friends or do personal errands that they previously wouldn’t of had time for. Although from a business side of things the competition would increase as more people jump onboard, it also allows small businesses to get a look in as well, as more people are interested in personal reviews rather than taking the companies word for it. For example, a cleaning product can share real results online and have influences promote/share the product. Rather than just a description on a website.
I will have a read of your paper now.
Thanks again for your feedback,
Renee
i appreciate your paper and how you have focused on different aspects, good and bad. Sometimes it is good to get a reminder that social media post are designed to depict the best of ones self or their children, parenting techniques.
I did have a giggle when reading the statement “While we sit there scrolling on our phone, looking down at our milk vomit covered T-shirt, sipping our cold coffee and tying up our dirty hair, feeling sorry for ourselves and wonder where we went wrong? This is proof of the different identities we see online.” It have described real life perfectly.
but i also thought it was important to mention how as a parent you don’t want any negative comments on your child or parenting so you post ‘pretty’ posts for the sake of pleasing others. I’ve heard from parents that “mum shaming” is such a big thing within social media and online communities so they don’t post or if they do, its a perfect post.
Thankyou for reading my paper 🙂
Exactly! I think it is very important that we remember that what you see on social media is just a snippet, maybe 10minutes of the person’s whole entire day.
Yes, mum shaming.. unfortunately, is a big thing these days. So i can understand how some mums feel the pressure to be the ‘perfect mum’, but i think as soon as everyone remembers we’re all in this together and what works for one family may not work for another, it will be a better place online. Less judgmental and more understanding.
Thanks again.
Renee,
Hey RBunter,
What an excellent paper! You certainly show all three aspects of the good, bad & ugly in relation to social media. Social media has indeed impacted our lives greatly but are we better off with it or without it? Under the bad side to posting online I feel you raise some great points in relation to parents. Absolutely they post photos that are only going to show their kids in the best light so not to face backlash, yet it will still happen. Sarah’s Day, a popular Youtuber and Instagram famous celeb has recently had a baby and although she keeps it pretty real and accurate about the raising of a new born, I feel that her posts just invite other mothers online to criticise all aspects of her raising her baby from his name to his clothing. Social media can be a cruel place for all using it. It can damage identities, people’s health and many aspects of one’s real life. Social media certainly does promote unreachable ideals and false exceptions for real world users and can lead to irreversible damages.
Again, a great paper and interesting read!
Thanks, BMaddison
Hi BMaddison,
Yes you make a good point, sharing personal information with the social media world makes some people think they have the right to comment on their lives or are included in the decision making. People forget that they are a human being with feelings too.
On the other side of things, it is a great community for Mum’s to come together and share their experiences or to gain advice, possibly even meet up with new mums, as entering that new chapter in life can be terrifying if there’s not a support group to fall back on.
Thank you for reading my paper,
Renee.
Hi there,
You picked a really interesting topic for your paper! I was wondering if, in your research, you came across any concerns about parents posting pictures of their children whilst they are still too young to give consent? Do you have any opinions on this? Particularly when it’s the case that the adult is making money off an account featuring the child?
Hello RBunter,
First of all, very appealing title. I loved the read of your paper as you balanced the the pros and cons of social media usage and put up some strong arguments.
You state that we should work to stay as authentic as possible on online platforms, but what about the influencers on these platforms? The often have to shed the snake’s skin to get into the role of products, services and even ideas they want to promote online. What’s your take on this one?
Regards,
Keshav
Hi RBunter,
You have done an amazing job on several things:
1/ Great title! It stands out because it is universally relatable.
2/ I adore your sense of humour. Hello “milk vomit covered T-shirt”!
3/ It is thorough and informative.
I just wish you could delve deeper into:
1/ What viewers can do to not compare themselves to these heavily edited content on social media and feel bad afterward. Should we all set our mindset to not fully believe in social media content in this present time?
2/ Online Identities: We all know that we’ll judge people and get judged on social media now. Does this fact change how we use these tools differently than when they first came out, especially when you know people are making money out of it.
I know it is too much to ask with this assignment word limit.
Well done and keep it up!
Hi RBunter,
Thanks for reviewing my paper, and I appreciate the referral to yours. I really enjoyed reading through your paper, I feel as if you bought up some great points on the topic of identity within social media!
Body image and struggles is such an important topic to discuss when looking at social media, and I feel as if you summarised this really well. It is so rare that you see “imperfections” on applications such as Instagram and Facebook, and it’s definitely a difficult task to avoid the perfection that leads to self doubt. I really loved your examples of Post Natal Depression, and feel as if this is definitely something that has shifted with the rise of social media.
You bought up some really similar points to what I discussed in my paper, about the “bad sides” of social media. I feel as if this is such a commonly discussed thing, and yet nothing is really done to change how individuals behave online.
This paper was enjoyable to read, and very well written.
Kind regards,
Danica